Spark of Insanity: Stagnant Situation

I'm trying not to think of anything and just leave my mind blank as it could be. Meditate the blankness, the broad side world of black. Or try to think of the world I'm dreaming of; the world of my own, building my own empire. What kind of world is that? Dun sa mga blog ko dati andun yung pagdefine ko ng mundong gusto ko galawan ng malaya. Maligayang nakahiga sa damohan at may tuwang pinapanuod ang asul ng langit, pinapakingan ang magandang tunog ng kalikasan, rumaragasang tubig, magagandang bulaklak na natatanaw ng aking mga mata. Ang gandang isipin at pangarapin. But to have that thought I felt very disappointed. You see people think its just a mere insanity and its impossible. I am disappointed to the humans when they think of those kind of things. I'll say NO, you're wrong. But if your still here in this earth I'm still be in the middle. When that time comes I'm already at peace, lying on my sleeping chamber. Now to say I want to make my brain dark as it could be, but when I see that place can't stop my mouth to release a small breathe of sigh. Its a wonderful world for me to imagine, to reach, I'm thinking if I want to have someone with me on it. I haven't thought of that yet. It seems that I am a lonely person in my entire life. For real! Happiness is choice, Where will you get it? When? To who? From who? (I'm trying to not to put any spiritual part here) All I want is to see everyone, everything happy and then I wonder if they'll forget me. I see myself tried everything then after that I'll be left out on the corner smiling at them, tried to join but they don't even know me. Aren't they so happy? Then I realize that I'm also thinking, waiting, and wanting to have someone who also wants me to be happy. The world itself covers with grief and despair. It cries can be heard everywhere, the pain can be felt from within. The world comes to its end. Poor thing I thought. As for me? still continue to live, have the best of everything and then who knows I might be happy too someday. I'm draining out with ideas my mind is out of place right now. Just a

(This is just a random boredome can't think of any blog to write. Too bad Ivy, too bad.)