photo by crniaaldea from weheartit
Good day blogger reader! After a long haul from blogging, here I am again sharing another events, insight and nonsense of my crazy, little life. I hope you enjoyed Christmas and open the year 2017 great. Mine it is so so, but whatever happened it is either a blessing in disguise or just another turn around of events. As much as I hate to put negative here in my blog, it does send bad vibes to everybody. However it is not bad to share our thoughts and feelings so it won't bottled up inside. So I'll share that recently I lost my job to an unfortunate event, I know it happens to everybody. But look at it a good thing, I can pursue now my dreams and goals not having any limited time on land to do the things I always prayed and long for. So I'll give you a few things why I am happy despite of what happened. I know there will be a financial restrain, but that is temporary until I get myself back in track again. I'm happy that I can rest at least before I go search for another job. This time I'll take my own opinion and what my guts tell me. I am happy indeed.
Being in the ship has it's disadvantages and advantages. The idea of travelling without costing you to pay the flights and hotels are good, that's one of the benefits of being a crew in a passenger ship. You see a lots of different places and meet different people. The downfall is this, I feel isolated, I can't escape the feeling of being imprisoned to the place I am no longer happy. I did things I shouldn't have done, I lost myself in the process and in between, it is damaging in the long run.
I'll be honest, I feel like I'm a prisoner there, the pain that cause me while I was working in a passenger ship is something I cannot erase anymore. It scarred me and the things I did that I can't believe that I did will remain in my memorie for the rest of my life. The idea of work and travel in a passenger ship was exciting and good at first, you see new places in a very limited time only then you have to go back on board and work again, no days off and you work 7 days a week, 10-14 hours a day. You do meet new crew which you will see almost everyday of your contract aside from guest, but when you are doing it for a long time it takes the life out of you. You can't go anywhere! If you have a problem and need to escape you can only see ocean and vast horizon that it seems doesn't end, that eats me up from the inside. I yearn for freedom!
I guess it is not bad to lose something for you to gain more. I always believe in God's word "The Lord gives, and the Lord takes away..." from Job 1:21. Despite of that I still rejoice, because enough is enough. Now I can taste the freedom, rebuild my relationship with God and pursue my dreams. I've always wanted to work somewhere else, move out to another country and build a new life doesn't matter if I start from zero, it's the adventure I've always wanted to take. It is never too late to do what I want for my life. There's always something out there for me and God's grace are sufficient that He never leaves or forsake us. You know what keeps me moving? That hope He implanted to me, that positive mind that makes me going, my family, the friends he blessed me and if you read Jeremiah 29:11 you'll have more reason to go and push.
xoxo,
Ivy
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